Reading onward in Thomas Fessenden's Original Poems (1806), what should turn up but another poem about dance, even lengthier and more detailed than "Horace Surpassed"! "The Rustick Revel" is less impressive as a poem, being made up entirely of rhyming couplets of utterly regular rhythm, but it's even thicker with dance references. As Nathaniel Hawthorne said in his biographical sketch of Fessenden:
He had caught the rare art of sketching familiar manners, and of throwing into verse the very spirit of society as it existed around him; and he had imbued each line with a peculiar yet perfectly natural and homely humor.
Hawthorne was referring to a different poem, but it could easily serve for this one as well. Among the highlights are the very calculated invitation list, the squire calling a dance, people messing up the figures, and trying to get out of paying the bill.
Once again, I'll give the entire poem in bold with my own commentary interspersed in italics. Fessenden's own footnotes have been moved to the end.
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The Rustick Revel.
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BUCK and beau, and belle and beldam
Seems to me we dance but seldom,
Fopling spruce, and damsel taper,
All convene, and have a caper.
I love "fopling" as a portmanteau of "fop" and "sapling" and the double meaning of "spruce".
Not a dance we've had this long time;
But you tell me 'tis a wrong time,
That 'twas never hotter known
Even in Africk's torrid zone.
Hot enough to melt the devil;
Sure 'tis foolish then to revel.
New England summers are miserably hot and humid; even today, many contra dances held in un-air-conditioned halls go on hiatus during the summer. The term "revel" is reminiscent of the seventeenth-century revels at the Inns of Court, which were occasions for young law students to dance.
Truce with preaching; take on paper,
Names of those who grace our caper;
See what lasses we can pick up
For our famous village kick up;
Manage matters with formality,
We'll have none except the QUALITY.
But what an interesting definition of QUALITY they have...
Put us down the squire and lawyer,
Nancy Tubbs, and Betty Sawyer;
Jenny Jinks is somewhat brown,
Joe, her brother, quite a clown:
True, but this one thing I'd speak on,
Their good father is a deacon,
And, if we should leave them out,
Pious deacon would, no doubt,
Beat it into many a thick-head
That our junketing is wicked;
Make in parish deal of rumpus,
People vex'd enough to thump us.
Strategic invitations to the children of the local deacon to avoid being preached against.
Lest we have a scanty ball
Put down married folks, and all.
Peter Grievous, and his black wife,
Though they both have had the jack-knife*
Still are rich, and cut a dash,
Put them down, for they have cash.
Dicky Dapper, lady's man,
Must be noted in our plan,
Though his brains won't fill a thimble,
Dicky Dapper dances nimble.
Betty Bilbo too, the heiress,
Though her homely phiz might scare us,
Many a lad would fain get round her,
For she is a thousand pounder.
Money, good dancing, and money, with the implication that married people were not an automatic invite -- the Grievouses were chosen despite their married status (and physical unattractiveness) because they needed more people and because the Grievouses were rich.
Matters now adjusted right,
Let us dance this very night;
Send for Sambo with his fiddle,
Tiddle diddle, tiddle diddle.
"Sambo" is slang for an African-American, so once again there's a black fiddler providing music.
Speak to landlord, and his lady,
Bid them make the ball-room ready,
Stores of punch, of wine, and brandy,
Cake and cheese must all be handy;
Seize the moment ere it passes,
Lads send billets to your lasses;
Almost time we should begin it,
Tackle chaise in half a minute.
Polly, prettiest of a million,
Ride behind me on a pillion;
Powder'd beaus, and maccaronies,
Fops too proud to ride on ponies;
Lawyers grand, and judges bulky,
Ride with honey in a sulkey.*
The use of "macaroni" to mean a fop is still known to Americans today from the song "Yankee Doodle", though I'm not sure how many really understand it. It certainly puzzled me as a child!
Now assembled at he hall,
Let us caper, one and all;
Squire, to top, I wish you'd trudge up,
Call a dance to ope the fudge up.
Probably the highest-ranking local, invited to the top to call the opening dance.
Lads and lasses take your places;
Holo, fiddler! play the "Graces!"
Most dancers think of the Graces as a quadrille figure, but there were several sets of conventional country dance figures set to a tune of that name as well, according to Kate Van Winkle Keller's Dance Figures in America database; scroll down the "G's" here to see them listed. An example from A Select Collection of the Newest and Most Favorite Country Dances (Otsego, New York, 1808): "Graces. Three couple set, six hands half round, set, back again, lead down, up, cast off one couple, two couple lead down, up, cast off, four hands across, half round, back, cross over, right and left."
Right and left, chassé at top --
Wrong below there, stop! stop! stop!
Balance Dick, then down the middle,
Deuce is in that fellow's fiddle,
Sure Miss Airy dances topping,
Lighter than a cricket hopping;
Sally Squad, as round as pumpkin,
Capers cuts with Benny Bumpkin;
Balance Joe, to Lucy Wiggle,
Pho! you're wrong, all higgle-piggle!
Right and left, chassé at top, balance, and down the middle are all common country dance figures. My experience suggests that "wrong below there!" in a country dance is not as unusual an occurrence as one would hope.
Now you're right, and keep it going:
Tim, you dance like man a mowing,
Graceless as a colt a prancing,
Can't you stand up when you're dancing?
Sammy Snider trots like thunder;
Sure he'll split the floor asunder;
See his partner pull and haul him,
Out of patience, I could maul him!
Well, the fam'd Egyptian camel
Dances much like our friend Sam'el!
Someone's dancing was compared to a camel in "Horace Surpassed" as well.
Now to side-board let us hie,
Ne'er be bashful when you're dry;
Give each buxom, rosy maid,
Brimming glass of lemonade;
Help yourself to wine and porter,
Sit by lass, and strive to court her;
Sit and chat with amorous billing,
Rapture every bosom thrilling,
Eyes that dart electrick flashes,
"Hot hearts" almost burnt to ashes!
Never will I tell you lies, man,
But suppose some heathen wise man,
Most unfeeling wight in nature,
Even Zeno were spectator,
Stoick sure would swear meherc'le
'Tis a most seraphick circle!
Fill once more your cheerful glasses,
Drink a health to all sweet lasses,
Drink and frolick time away,
None so happy, none so gay,
Till, at length, the bill is bawl'd for,
And, alas! our money call'd for!
Yonder manager, by beckoning,
Seems to say, "come pay your reckoning;"
Murky phiz, and shrug of silence,
Speak a wish to be a mile hence!
Dick, who says he came away
Purse forgot, and cannot pay,
Tells the landlord how to cook it,
Whispers "thank you, sir, to book it!"
"Forgot his purse", sure. I wonder how well the equivalent of "put it on my tab" worked at that time.
Fiddler, play us one tune more,
Just to end with reel of four,
Ralphy Rattle, spunky fellow,
Raking round till he is mellow,
Rudely muttering and swearing,
Seems to lack a little airing.
And the final dance is a classic Scotch reel for four!
Misses, squires, and gentlefolks,
Calls for Nabobs,* hats, and cloaks;
True, 'tis late, but that's no matter,
All good night, 'tis time to scatter.
Come, my dear, and mount behind me,
Lover true you'll ever find me.
Stir up Dobbin! Well, my dearest,
Uncle Jotham's road is nearest;
Now by fence we safely land,
Now we walk in, hand in hand.
Sit awhile in social chat --
Pray what follow'd after that?
Toy and prattle, sir, awhile,
Right New England courting style,
But you'll please to make the best on't,
I'm not bound to tell the rest on't.
One wonders from the concluding lines if the next step was bundling.
* In New England they have a custom of presenting a person who has an ugly appearance with a jack-knife. The donee, in such a case, preserves the present till he can find some one whose ugly phiz, in his opinion, gives him a superiour claim to the favour.
* [sulkey] A kind of gig or one-horse carriage, in which two sociable people may possibly be accommodated.
* Nabobs were a kind of outside garment formerly worn by the dashing belles of America.
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An original publication of the poem may be seen starting here. It was not reprinted in the 1837 collection Terrible tractoration: and other poems by Christopher Caustic.
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